April 17, 2009
Tom Clancy's film adaptations
Sean Connery, right, and Sam Neill, second from right, are the Skipper and Second-in-Command of the Soviet Union's biggest and baddest ballistic missile sub, The Red October.
Novelist Tom Clancy first appeared on my reading radar back in 1984, when I was serving aboard the USS Blueback (SS-581), one of the United States Navy's last diesel-electric submarines. Clancy, an insurance salesman with a keen interest in military affairs, took the real-life Storzhevoi mutiny (Soviet officer seizes control of his destroyer and plans to broadcast a denunciation of the Brezhnev regime; the ship is attacked and disabled by Soviet aircraft strafing runs ... and the mutiny leader is later executed) and transferred the plot to the gigantic ballistic missile submarine, the Red October.
The novel, The Hunt For Red October, which received a huge celebrity endorsement when then-Pres. Reagan was spotted holding a copy and said that it was a great read, was very popular in the fleet. I had many conversations with fellow submariners about the accuracy of the novel; Clancy got it right, all of it. We thought that he must have been getting a lot of inside scoop from contacts in the Silent Service, because there was no way a civilian could have captured the way we did business with such an eye for detail.
Yeah, that's former GOP Presidential Candidate Fred Thompson as a U.S. Navy Admiral in The Hunt For Red October. Alec Baldwin is in the background
The Hunt For Red October became an exciting film in 1990, starring Alec Baldwin as Jack Ryan, Sean Connery as Capt. Ramius, the commanding officer of the Soviet Boomer, and Sam Neill, James Earl Jones, Scott Glenn, Tim Curry and Fred Thompson in supporting roles. Directed by John McTiernan, it was a taut thriller, nearly as good as the novel, suffering little in the way of Hollywood glamorization or script lobotomization.
About the only thing that bothered me was the dramatic lighting effects aboard the subs, especially the far-too-bright instrument panel lights. Those buttons and gauges were blinding!
Baldwin was very good as Ryan, and I was disappointed to hear that he'd bowed out of the sequel, in favor of starring in Streetcar Named Desire on Broadway.
Harrison Ford takes out an IRA terrorist in his first film portrayal of Jack Ryan in Patriot Games.
His replacement, Harrison Ford, was good in the second film, Patriot Games (1992), but was looking a little long in the tooth by the time he appeared in the third film, Clear and Present Danger (1994).
That's Jack Ryan? The hero of Red October and Patriot Games? The doofus on the right, sitting behind Morgan Freeman? Okaaaaaaay. I don't think so.
The producers did a reboot for the fourth screen adaptation of a Jack Ryan novel, casting Ben Affleck in 2002's The Sum of All Fears. Affleck was as far from Harrison Ford's gravitas-laden, grim take on the protagonist as you can imagine, short of casting Clay Aiken in the lead, but that was the least of the film's problems.
The novel dealt with a plot by Muslim terrorists to acquire a nuclear weapon -- lost by the Israelis in the '73 War -- and smuggle it into the United States, conceal it at the Superbowl, and vaporize thousands of Americans.
Paramount Studios decided that it was impolitic to pick on Muslims; the whole crazed jihadi thing was overdone, doncha' know? And who'd believe a bunch of Muslims would actually try and kill thousands of Americans? It'd be suicide! Suicide, I tell you!.
In a bit of politically correct stupidity, the bad guys became neo-Nazis, white supremacists intent on avenging Uncle Adolf's defeat, lead by the oily, evil Alan Bates, doing his best, "Vee haff vays awf makink you tok" German accent.
Gack.
Between Affleck's smooth-browed earnestness and Bates' moustache-twirling line delivery, it was hard to decide which bomb was bigger: the film or the nuke in the stadium. Even the presence of Morgan Freeman, James Cromwell and Liev Schreiber couldn't save this mess.
DVD Verdict reviewed the recently released Blu-Ray version of the flick; the critic wasn't as down on the film as I am, but he did recount what sounds like a must-listen commentary track.
[A] second commentary is nothing short of a knockout. [Director Phil Alden] Robinson is joined by author Tom Clancy, who proves to be a particularly tough critic.
He begins the commentary by saying, "I'm Tom Clancy, the guy who wrote the book they ignored." It just gets harsher from there. Clancy is eager to point out every single instance in which Robinson made a technical mistake, which is often painfully funny. "Ha…those people would never say anything that pointless." "This scene is childish." "That thing you did there…that's total bulls—t."
One of my favorite exchanges:
Clancy: Is that supposed to be a bomb or a torpedo?
Robinson: It's a bomb.
Clancy: Huh. You've got all the dimensions completely wrong.
Robinson: Wait…actually, no, it's a torpedo.
Clancy: The dimensions are still way off.
Clancy begrudgingly acknowledges a few small moments that he thought were nice, but mostly is content to sit back and take huge swipes at Robinson's work. After a while, Robinson starts becoming so fearful of Clancy's criticisms that he becomes quick to try and point out any possible technical flaws in each scene before Clancy can beat him to it. However, you can also sense him getting genuinely pissed off as things proceed, which can be particularly heard in one moment:
Clancy: You know, the President in the book was based on Michael Dukakis. Left-wingers are actually more likely to turn to nuclear weapons as a last resort, because they tend to get themselves backed up against a wall and then have nothing left to do. Right-wingers tend to catch that sort of thing earlier. I'm not saying that for political reasons, I'm just saying that tends to be the case more often than not.
Robinson (in a cold and extremely harsh manner): Oh, I will be glad to debate that point with you at some other time…sir.
I don't know what Paramount was thinking when they decided to include this track, but I'm so grateful they did. It's been a long time since I've heard a commentary this savagely entertaining.
Sounds like I may have to pick up a copy in the used bin at the local video store, just to listen to Clancy beat up on the hapless director.
Posted by Mike Lief at April 17, 2009 11:45 AM
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Comments
I tried watching SOAF once, but shut it off in the first two minutes, when I found Jack Ryan's moral background tossed right out the window as he rolled out of bed with a woman not his wife. It wasn't a puritan reaction, but rather the reverse-bowdlerization of the character that offended. But hearing Clancy beat up on it could be wild fun.
Posted by: Dan at April 17, 2009 05:02 PM
I remember being surprised at the detailed description of life on a sub at that time, too. I remember even thinking that some of the information he was given was classified. But that couldn't be.
Take care Mike. Glad to see the site is still up.
Posted by: Vince Cole at April 17, 2009 05:26 PM
I didn't even know that SOAF had been made into a movie. No loss. I didn't think it was the best of the novels, either. Doomed from the inception, I guess. The stories became too much about Jack Ryan and his astonishing rise to national leadership and power. Hornblower was content to stay in the Navy, Sharpe in the Army . . . couldn't Jack Ryan have had a greatly entertaining literary life without becoming president?
Posted by: The Little Coach at April 19, 2009 09:44 PM