« September 2003 | Main | May 2004 »
April 21, 2004
The Taxpayers Ought to Sue
So, I spent Tuesday morning attending a four-hour session, mandated by the County, to learn about how to prevent workplace discrimination. It was very informative, and I'm a better person for it.
I now know that it's wrong to look at my co-workers.
I must not curse.
I must leave my emotions at the office door.
I must not EVER touch my colleagues -- with the exception of a very professional handshake; firm, brisk, not moist, and definitely without any palm tickling.
It was, quite possibly, the biggest waste of time in the history of human civilization. We began by listening to a lecture on how gender-based lawsuits against the cops began. The instructor told us that police departments required applicants to be at least 5-feet, eight-inches tall, weighing at least 140 pounds.
She then asked us who this requirement excluded.
I answered, "Midgets."
She looked disappointed as she explained to me that, yes, that's correct, but we call them Little People now.
Well, how do you tell midgets from dwarves, then?
Anyhow, it was a horror show, a graphic demonstration of the havoc wrought upon the workplace by the courts. The worst of the worst was the discussion of the Americans with Disabilities Act. Our "facilitator" told us that alcoholics are protected from workplace discrimination.
Alcoholism is in the DSM-IV, so it's a Disability, donchaknow? Unfortunately, so's pedophilia, drug addiction and necrophilia. After listening attentively, I'm pretty sure the County needs to provide a nice quiet place for junkies to go on the nod after shooting up in their cubicle.
Of course, that cubicle better not have a Snap-On Tools calendar or a copy of the Bible laying around, 'cause that could create a hostile work environment.
Did I mention the school employee who was told to either remove her crucifix or hide it beneath her clothes?
As Socrates said, "I shit you not."
We finished this mess by watching a video about the proper way to act in the workplace. I don't know how other groups reacted, but we yelled out the answers to the multiple-choice quiz in the tape, consistently picking the insensitive answers, hooting and hollering as we mocked the morons stuck acting out these idiotic skits.
Madame Instructress was not amused.
Good thing the County's not experiencing a fiscal crisis and laying off workers. If that were true, they'd never be able to afford the cost of multiple sessions run by private consultants and the loss of manhours -- er, peoplehours -- to the taxpayers.
It's a wonder anyone bothers to run a business.
Posted by Mike Lief at 09:35 PM | TrackBack
April 10, 2004
Peace Through Superior Firepower
Armed Forces Journal has a page with some videos illustrating the latest in defense technology, from last year's tradeshow/shootout. I could indulge in some sober analysis, but it's much more satisfying to play the videos while muttering, "Gawd, that's cool."
Our guys overseas could sure some of this stuff; check out the bulletproof glass and the modified M-60.
Hat tip to Gizmodo.
Posted by Mike Lief at 11:24 AM | TrackBack
April 03, 2004
So Funny It Shouldn't be Free
This coverage of the Kerry campaign is HILARIOUS -- if you're drinking a refreshing beverage, set it down before clicking on the link. I'm not familiar with the author, but his stuff is teriffic. His retelling of the often acrimonious horserace between Kerry and Clark is brilliant, and the account of the post-Iowa flamout, detailed here and here, is great.
Folks, I'm not overselling it; this guy's good.
Posted by Mike Lief at 01:01 PM | TrackBack
It's been too long!
Well, life has certainly provided countless reasons to do something other than blog -- like reading other blogs. But there's *so* much going on, I'm compelled to pull the keyboard a little closer. Besides, my latest book is done, and my writing is my own (for a little while). So, let's chat, shall we?
John Podhoretz has an interesting column today detailing the declining electoral fortunes of the Dauphin du Kerry, who is doing the electoral equivalent of a lawn-dart impression, d'accord? Between the economy rebounding and Bush hanging tough on terrorism, I'm not sure what the Dems have as an issue that resonates with the voters who don't belong to the ranks of tinfoil-helmet wearing moonbats.
The always interesting Glenn Reynolds offers some commentary on the behavior of the left, complaining bitterly after their kudos to the killers of the Americans in Falujah resulted in advertisers pulling their ads. Ain't free speech a bitch? Of course, the left long ago forgot that "free" is not synonomous with "consequence free."
More to come.
It's good to be back.